How come that it always need to be something. Am I not alowed to get a easy moment for my brain anytime?
Ying and yang, some bad and some good. Or maybe good against good or bad against bad. One thing against another. Take this and leave that, leave this and get that, heads or tails.
I know I probably shouldn't hate it at all. Me, that dreams about the free life. And if that shouldn't contain options then it probably should be something strange.
But still...I can just feel someone put there hand through my navel, grab my intestine and turning it around time after time. I can almost hear the blood pumping in my ears when the heart increasing the speed. And someone else could probably see how it start to come out smoke from them too, as the braincells start to have a raveparty with out my permission.
When it's about some routings in my life I have soooo difficoult to both know and decide what I want and what should be best. Where to live? How to live? Career ladder, no career ladder? With whom, for whom? So many "to be or not to be".
Sometimes it feels like it should be so much easier just to be one of them with the dream about the little family or about the mapped way in the career life.
But it feels like my dreams is in another world. And I'm just trying to match the steps I need to take here in every routing I passing by. Where to put down the next foot....
Ying and yang, some bad and some good. Or maybe good against good or bad against bad. One thing against another. Take this and leave that, leave this and get that, heads or tails.
I know I probably shouldn't hate it at all. Me, that dreams about the free life. And if that shouldn't contain options then it probably should be something strange.
But still...I can just feel someone put there hand through my navel, grab my intestine and turning it around time after time. I can almost hear the blood pumping in my ears when the heart increasing the speed. And someone else could probably see how it start to come out smoke from them too, as the braincells start to have a raveparty with out my permission.
When it's about some routings in my life I have soooo difficoult to both know and decide what I want and what should be best. Where to live? How to live? Career ladder, no career ladder? With whom, for whom? So many "to be or not to be".
Sometimes it feels like it should be so much easier just to be one of them with the dream about the little family or about the mapped way in the career life.
But it feels like my dreams is in another world. And I'm just trying to match the steps I need to take here in every routing I passing by. Where to put down the next foot....
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